#In-Game Cursing

Sometimes a character or NPC just needs to add some colorful words in their dialogue. For fun. For emphasis. For character flavor. Below are a few curses and insults my NPCs have used. Do you have any interesting D&D phrases you like to use?


  • All the charm of a hag at sunrise
  • Gelatinous goo is smarter
  • Goblin garbage!
  • Gnoll chew toy
  • I heard shriekers sing better than that one
  • I’d rather look at a basilisk [gorgon] than …
  • Mind flayer leftovers, is that one!
  • More foul than a mountain troll’s asscrack
  • Ogre bait
  • Ooze leavings
  • Quasit kisser
  • Slime eating goat mauler
  • St Cuthbert be praised! Finally a word of sense.
  • Two-headed vermin dung
  • Undead foot fungus
  • Useless piece of Bhaal toejam!
  • Your father was a kobold and your mother a rust monster!
  • Yer nut’tin but a Palor puppet (to a paladin/cleric of)


  • Bloody balor
  • Balor’s balls!
  • Dragon snot!
  • Festering dire rat penis
  • Flatulent fairy dust
  • Fairy farts!
  • Fiends’ farts! This place stinks!
  • Goblins’ sweaty gonads
  • Kobold crap!
  • Kobold’s crusty crap!
  • Ogre’s belching breath!
  • Soggy steaming troll turds!
  • Tiamat’s titties!
  • Troll stinky turd
  • Vampire spit! [troll spit, kobold spit, goblin spit, … etc.]

Curses upon you

  • Abyss take you!
  • Boiling spit upon yer house!
  • Lick a dracolich’s bony arse for all I care
  • May a rust monster eat your blade!
  • To the Nine Hells with you and your devilish words

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