Sometimes a character or NPC just needs to add some colorful words in their dialogue. For fun. For emphasis. For character flavor. Below are a few curses and insults my NPCs have used. Do you have any interesting D&D phrases you like to use?

Insult

• All the charm of a hag at sunrise
• Gelatinous goo is smarter
• Goblin garbage!
• Gnoll chew toy
• I heard shriekers sing better than that one
• I’d rather look at a basilisk [gorgon] than …
• Mind flayer leftovers, is that one!
• More foul than a mountain troll’s asscrack
• Ogre bait
• Ooze leavings
• Quasit kisser
• Slime eating goat mauler
• St Cuthbert be praised! Finally a word of sense.
• Two-headed vermin dung
• Undead foot fungus
• Useless piece of Bhaal toejam!
• Your father was a kobold and your mother a rust monster!
• Yer nut’tin but a Palor puppet (to a paladin/cleric of)

Upset/Excitement

• Bloody balor
• Balor’s balls!
• Dragon snot!
• Festering dire rat penis
• Flatulent fairy dust
• Fairy farts!
• Fiends’ farts! This place stinks!
• Goblins’ sweaty gonads
• Kobold crap!
• Kobold’s crusty crap!
• Ogre’s belching breath!
• Soggy steaming troll turds!
• Tiamat’s titties!
• Troll stinky turd
• Vampire spit! [troll spit, kobold spit, goblin spit, … etc.]

Curses upon you

• Abyss take you!
• Boiling spit upon yer house!
• Lick a dracolich’s bony arse for all I care
• May a rust monster eat your blade!
• To the Nine Hells with you and your devilish words